The Malaysian Insider

NOV 5 — What do fireworks and a big bonfire each year on this night mean? Aside from some inherent, nearly prehistoric ignition of pyromanic glee in children, the only (tenuous) link to Guy Fawkes, who is “celebrated” on this date in the UK, is the fact that our villain attempted to blow up Parliament.

Are children then also encouraged to exercise such arsonic fervour when they grow up? No, that would be too simplistic. Instead, what is being invoked here is probably the link between fire, hell and the demonic.

OCT 22 — I mean, seriously, does anyone really need to point out how Rafael Benitez is in trouble? Four defeats on the trot, Liverpool's worse run since 1987, is solid enough so there's no need to waste column inches saying, "Benitez really needs to work a miracle against Manchester United this weekend" or "The team relies too much on Steven Gerrard and Fernando Torres."

These are bloody obvious statements. Obvious and, in the case of the latter, dumb.

OCT 20 — The story of how Damien Hirst became arguably the most well-known name in British contemporary art may sound apocryphal, as it involves a shark, a bag of chips and a tabloid paper.

But it is in fact true. The star of the Young British Artists generation that popped up in the 90s had just only been discovered by ad mogul-turned-art collector Charles Saatchi and was exhibiting without much fanfare as the tabloid press — usually of a tut-tutting sort — were only interested in ridiculing the young 'uns pretensions of being artists.

OCT 6 — The past week has seen the UK media in a frenzy over this headline: “The Sun Says: Labour’s lost it.”

After a dozen years of supporting Labour, it withdrew its support for under-siege Prime Minister Gordon Brown ahead of a general election that must be called by June 2010.

Perhaps in Malaysia, where cynicism and indeed, scoffing mockery of print media is ubiquitous, a newspaper making such a proclamation about any political party would be dismissed as mere gimmick.

OCT 1 — It's two months into the season, and Rafael Benitez still doesn't know what is his best team. In usual circumstances, this is not a reason to panic.

But the Spaniard has had five seasons to shape his squad, with only Jamie Carragher and Steven Gerrard left from the Champions' League-winning side of 2005. With rightback Glen Johnson the only new signing playing first eleven football, there is little to suggest that Benitez needs time to get to know his players.